Escaping Martha Mode

“But the Lord answered her,

'Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things,'"

Luke 10:41 (NIV)  

A Big Question 

What if one of the biggest threats to our families isn’t conflict — but distraction?

There’s a reason C. S. Lewis imagined demons talking strategy in The Screwtape Letters. Most men expect the enemy to attack through obvious evil. But often the more effective strategy is distraction, hurry, and endless busyness.

A dad sat on the couch answering work emails while his little boy tried to show him a drawing. Without looking up, he said, “Just a second, buddy.” Finally, the little boy climbed into his lap, grabbed his dad’s face, and said, “Dad, I need your eyes.”

That hits home because most of us know exactly what that feels like.

Martha Mode

We love our families, but we live distracted. Our minds stay tied up with work, schedules, notifications, and endless responsibilities. We’re home physically, but mentally we’re somewhere else.

That’s why the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10:38–42 feels so real. Martha welcomed Jesus into her home, but instead of enjoying His presence, she got consumed with everything that needed to be done while Mary sat listening at Jesus’ feet.

Then Jesus said:

“You are worried and upset about many things…” (Luke 10:41, NIV)

That’s Martha Mode.

This Still Happens Now

What’s interesting is Martha wasn’t just distracted — she was frustrated. In Luke 10:40, she basically says, “Lord, don’t You care that I’m doing all this by myself?” Her stress changed how she saw people. Mary stopped being someone to enjoy and became somebody in the way.

That still happens now. When life is driven by pressure and productivity, family members can start feeling like interruptions instead of people we’re called to love well. It’s hard to lead people spiritually when they rarely feel like they have our attention.

What Our Kids Need

The truth is, our wives, kids, and grandkids usually don’t need more stuff from us nearly as much as they need us. Our attention. Our conversations. Our presence.

Strong families are built in smaller moments — listening after a long day, laughing together, praying together, putting the phone down, and actually paying attention.

Jesus modeled that everywhere He went. He stopped for people. He listened. He made people feel seen.

Our families don’t just need us around. They need us present.

Larry Martin

MD5 Facilitator